Welcome to The Keys To Success Series! The purpose of The Keys To Success series is to serve as a guide to help you become more successful in your entrepreneurial efforts. Notice, however, that many of the keys can be applied to other areas of your life as well such as relationships, career, family, health and fitness, etc. Each article will talk about a particular key area necessary for success, for example: goal setting, belief system, the right attitude for success and more.
The first Key To Success is to have an open mind. You must clear your mind of all previous knowledge and believes that you’ve had up to now. Why? Look at your life now. You are reading this article because you feel you’re lacking success in your business, right? Or maybe you feel you could achieve a higher level of success than you are experiencing right now. Regardless of the specific reason, you are not satisfied with where you are now or you wouldn’t be reading this article right now, correct?
To clear your mind will be one of the most important keys to your success, if not the most important thing you can do. You need to be ready to think differently than what you have so far to produce different results than what you’ve had up until now. If you keep doing what you’ve been doing so far, how can you expect different results? It is your previous thinking and actions (or lack of action) that has brought you to where you are now, hasn’t it? Are you beginning to see the connection?
This was Einstein’s definition of insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.
You also have to clear your mind from what other people has said you could or couldn’t do. This includes parents, other family members, friends, society, the government including the school system. Family members and friends are well intentioned and they want to protect you from pain or failure. However, do they have the level of success that you desire? Why, then, would you listen to them? These people or entities want to maintain the status quo, sometimes they feel threatened that you might actually succeed and that would make them feel inferior or inadequate. In reality, they are usually afraid of change, the unknown. Do you want to continue being part of the masses? Then continue doing the same thing you’ve been doing. It’s easier and comfortable, right? I don’t mean to sound harsh or rude but it is that simple. If you think and act like everyone else does, then you’ll have what everyone else has too.
Where would we be if the Wright brothers would have accepted the thinking of the time that man was not meant to fly? Or if Christopher Columbus would not have thought outside the box and believed that the Earth was flat?
Find someone that have what you desire and copy what this person does or did. Be open to what this person did or does, listen, and be coachable. Many people say that they are coachable and claim that they understand and know what to do, but when it comes down to changing what they have been doing, they are reluctant and find many excuses as to why they can’t do this or that.
It is your choice. Understand that to live differently, you have to think differently. Thought precedes action. This is the reason why I chose this to be the first Key To Success in this series of articles. Because if you don’t open your mind to what I have to say, you will continue being part of the masses. Continue watching lousy TV at night, playing the lotto, changing jobs lying to yourself that this is a better opportunity but really, you’re still being a slave to a paycheck, and dreaming of being rich.
You are master of your life, you decide.
Tags: business keys to success, key to success, keys to success, keys to success in business
Few people realize that the best way to achieve your goals of happiness and success is simply through raising your self esteem. It’s surprising nowadays how many people genuinely suffer from very low self esteem, and it’s a problem that most people feel holds them back from enjoying their lives and achieving their goals and ambitions. Most people feel like their self esteem cannot be changed, and that if it’s low it’s likely to remain low, but this is simply not true, the great thing about your self esteem is that you can improve it yourself, no matter how low you feel it is.
Most people assume that self esteem is how high your confidence is, where this is somewhat true, it is not entirely the case. Self confidence does come into it, but your self esteem as a whole is a lot more than this. There are, in fact, many people throughout the world who are very confident yet have very low self esteem, people who often fall into this category tend to be singers, actors and comedians, who often give off an aura of confidence on stage, yet off stage they feel insecure. The word ‘esteem’ itself is actually Latin, and means ‘to estimate’ therefore, self esteem is how you estimate yourself as a person. In order to do this, there are 5 questions you must ask yourself, and the answers will dictate your self-esteem.
These questions are:
Am I deserving of love?
Do I think that I am a good human being?
Am I deserving of happiness?
Deep down, do I feel that I am a good person?
And finally, Do I like myself?
Those who find it hard to answer any of those questions with ‘yes’ are often sufferers of poor self esteem. If you found that you answered many of these questions with ‘no’ then you’re not alone, and there are things that you can do in order to improve your self esteem as well as your quality of life.
The first step is to simply take on board that you are a wonderful and special, and there is nobody in the world like you, you are completely unique, all your thoughts and feelings are all your own and you are the only one in control. This means that out of a total of over six billion people in the whole world, you are a one-off creation and completely original. So surely, if you are the only one of you on the whole planet, then surely you should feel and accept that you have just as much right as any other person to be on this earth? It’s an unusual way of looking at it, but this simple first step can often open up your eyes to the world around you and your originality.
The second thing is to realize that you are entitled to make mistakes, just like anyone else, the only way we learn is by getting things wrong before we get them right, do stop being so hard on yourself, you’re only human and you have the right to make mistakes sometimes. Respect yourself and allow yourself to make these mistakes, and above all, don’t beat yourself up afterwards.
There are a few other things you can do that might help you to realize the positives about yourself and raise your self esteem. One popular technique is the ’50 things I like about me’ list, this list is something you need to write yourself and if you’re severely lacking in self esteem it could take you quite a while, but persevere, don’t try and write it if you’re having a particularly low or bad day, take time out when you’re feeling okay and create a list of things that you like about yourself. Having this list is a great thing to come back to, as you start to think throughout your day about the different things you may not have realized that you do that you like about yourself. It’s sounds unusual, but it’s worth a go, and it can work wonders. You can write anything from your characteristics, your looks, even the nice things you do from day to day. Once it’s completed, keep it somewhere that you can see it and be constantly reminded that you have many good qualities. Once you’ve reached 50 comes the hard part, try and add to it every so often, for the rest of your life, in order to constantly remind yourself of the good things you do from day to day.
Self esteem can be awkward to raise, especially if yours is particularly low, but it can be done, and starting small is the best thing you can do. Try these tips, and you might be surprised about the difference it makes on the short and long term.
If this seems too difficult to accomplish by yourself, you may need the assistance of a coach. A coach will help you stay on task, see things about yourself that you don’t see, guide you and motivate you to discover who you really are and all you can accomplish when you believe in yourself. Who needs a coach? We all do!
Diana Samalot lives in Port Saint Lucie, Florida with the love of her life Jim, her 2 teenage twin daughters, Giselle and Gabriella, her 3 dogs Faith, Major and Roxie and her cat Shadow.
Diana is a Life and Success Coach and founder of DoItNowCoach.com. Her life experiences, dedication, understanding, patience and desire to help people makes her a compassionate coach for people who want to embark in the exciting journey of self discovery, self empowerment and growth. Diana helps people discover who they really are, the gifts and strengths that are within them but not yet discovered or developed to make possible the positive changes in their lives that they need not just to survive but to thrive and succeed; to overcome self limiting beliefs for those that have the strong desire to do so.
If you have a strong desire to make the positive changes in your life that you need and to overcome self limiting beliefs that are preventing you to succeed in your relationships, finances and/or health go to http://www.doitnowcoach.com/sq and subscribe to her Free newsletter.
Tags: boosting self esteem, building self esteem, develop self esteem, developing self esteem, improving self esteem, raising self esteem
Procrastination is unfortunately something that a lot of us suffer from regularly, whether it’s just an occasional ‘put off ‘til tomorrow’ or a recurrent lack of drive and motivation. Procrastination can often hold us back from what we really want in life, and unfortunately, it’s something that can crop up at any time of life, no matter who you are. A lot of people often assume that procrastination is simply being lazy, but this isn’t always the case. Often, feelings of tiredness, hopelessness, panic or even depression can cause us to put things off and avoid reality completely.
Procrastination is a trap, and once we’ve fallen in it can be very difficult to get back out, so why do we do it? Well for many people, procrastination is simply a way of coping with emotions and physical symptoms that often come with depression, often caused by panic. The unfortunate truth is that often, a ‘snowballing’ effect can happen, you may be stressed and under pressure at work, then causing you to panic, which may then trigger depression which in turn can make thing very difficult for you to do. However it happened, it’s important you get out of it, otherwise you may find that nothing will ever get done because you’re too miserable and negative to bring yourself to do it.
There are 5 main ‘style’s of procrastination, you may feel that you fall under one mains style, or a mixture.
Organization and keeping track of things is very difficult
You fear people disapprove of you, or fear disapproval itself
Important tasks seem futile, and so overwhelming it feels stupid to even attempt them
Hostile feelings towards someone, and punishing them by putting things off
Routines and Schedules cause you to feel rebellious
These styles of procrastination can often also overlap in one of four different themes: Self Doubt, Discomfort Dodging, Guilt Driven and Habitual. Self Doubt is people who feel that there are rigid standards about how certain things need to be done and often fear they will fail, they often second guess themselves and will delay taking action against procrastinating. Discomfort dodging is when a person will avoid activities that will cause them anxiety, discomfort or even distress, however, often by dodging the activity, feelings and tension don’t go away, and instead mount due to the avoidance. Guilt driven people often feel extreme guilt when tasks go done, but instead of acting on their guilt and working, they instead procrastinate, avoiding the issue and the guilt completely. And finally, Habitual people are people who have found procrastination to be an automatic response within their lives, they have put things off so often, that they feel it is just a part of them now, and there is nothing they can do to change it.
But there are things you can do to change it, and get out of your procrastination cycle once and for all. The first thing is a simple idea, but it works all the same – make a list! It sounds ridiculous, but it does actually work. Just go to your local stationary store and get yourself a large notebook, and make lists and plans for yourself to stick to, prioritize everything on your list in order of importance, and allocate times for these tasks to be done (1 hour, 2 hours etc). The key to battling procrastination is organization, by allocating specific times; you’re ensuring that you have enough time to do everything and get it done! If a task is particularly big, then split it up into manageable time slots, making sure that progress is steady, and you’re not giving yourself too much to do.
However, you also need to create some time for yourself, or ‘reward time’. Reward time gives you an incentive to get things done, because you know once it’s done you can have a break and reward yourself for your hard work. Procrastination is a tough mountain to climb, but once you reach the top you’re free to reap the rewards of an organized, healthy and happy lifestyle, as well as the true relief and satisfaction that comes with having nothing weighing you down!
Tags: how to avoid procrastination, how to overcome procrastination, overcome procrastination, overcoming procrastination
How would you like 2010 to end? What’s the first step to make that happen? How long until you get started? Do It Now!!
I wanted to expand some more on the article I wrote recently “Mental Attitude Is Everything” as there is so much to say about this topic of Positive Attitude. And, don’t be surprised if later on I will want to cover this topic again as I truly believe that Mental Attitude IS Everything.
So, what does it take to have a positive mental attitude? As I ponder on the response to this question it occurs to me that there is no easy way to answer this. It would seem that some people are born with the ability, if you will, to be eternally positive about everything that happens to them while others see nothing but hardships and failure. Although, these people are often perceived as “Nothing bad ever happens to him/her”, that they were born with a “lucky star”. As I mentioned in my previous article “Mental Attitude is Everything”, these “hardships or failures” should really be seen as opportunities, stepping stones toward the goal that you want to achieve. But, how you might ask do we achieve this positive mental attitude? It was not easy for me to answer this question but this is how I believe you can change your attitude and become a more positive person.
The first step that comes to my mind is Attention. Pay attention to your thought pattern. What is the first thought that comes to your mind when something does not go as you wanted it or expected it? Is it “Now what?” or “I just knew this was going to happen!” or any other negative thought pattern. This may be one of the most difficult steps because you probably have been so deeply conditioned to follow this kind of thinking for so long, probably most of your life, that it happens automatically. Not only that, but it is likely that this conditioning began from your parents or whoever was involved in your emotional development, even society! Now, I said “difficult” NOT IMPOSSIBLE. Every time this negative thinking comes to you, replace it with something positive such as “I wonder where this turn of events will take me” or “Well, it seems I’m going to be learning something new”, you catch my drift.
The second step that occurs to me that you need to do is to be Disciplined and Patient (Is that steps A and B within step 2?). This is going to take time! Be patient with yourself. Rome wasn’t built in a day and neither was your thinking pattern. You are going to find yourself going back to that negative mental attitude over and over again. Be easy on yourself, forgive yourself and try again and again. Have a list of responses ready so that you don’t have to think of what to substitute your negative thought pattern with. Be prepared!
I left the best for last, you must have FAITH! You have to believe that it is possible to change your habit of thinking negatively in response to your life’s events. This is a learned behavior and it is possible to change it. You can change anything about yourself if you put your mind to it. No excuses. You might find yourself saying “Oh, this is the way I am” or “I’ve always been this way”. This is nonsense, excuses that people make to not go through the effort of changing, of improving themselves. These negative thoughts are NOT who you are. You were not born this way! They are your thoughts and therefore you have the power to change them if that is truly what you want. If you believe or have faith that you can change your negative thought pattern into a positive one, then you will put the effort necessary to accomplish your goal.
Try these steps and you will find yourself living a happier life, filled with new opportunities. You will ask yourself, where did these opportunities come from? Well, they were always there, you were just blinded by your own negative thoughts.
How does this impacts you? Tell me your thoughts.
Tags: negative mental attitude, negative thinking, negative thought pattern, positive mental attitude, positive thinking, positive thought pattern
What is procrastination?
Psychologists define procrastination as the mechanism that we use to cope with the anxiety related to beginning or completing a task or decision. These behaviors that we use to procrastinate are useless, delaying and often even counterproductive. We put off completing a task or making a decision that we find uncomfortable or dislike. We tell to ourselves that we are waiting for that perfect moment, that perfect opportunity. We come up with a million and one excuses as to why we are waiting to start or finish what we started. We have all procrastinated at one point on our lives. It is normal to procrastinate to some degree. But, when this is a chronic behavior or when we procrastinate about something that we claim we want to do, such as loosing weight, quit smoking or starting your own business, then you must look deep inside of you and find the real reason for this procrastinating behavior.
Why do we procrastinate?
A more accurate question may be at times what do I feel I gain by not getting started or finished what I started? In my experience, fear plays a great factor in procrastinating. Fear of what might happen when our lives change as a result of taking action. Fear of change, of the unknown. Of course we know that our lives will be different, but how different? Will it still feel like “my” life? Will I feel like I am “me”? Fear of failure, we cannot fail at what we don’t get started. There might be fear of loosing what we have, what we know and feel comfortable with. For example, someone that wants to loose weight but procrastinates beginning the lifestyle changes that will lead him/her to loosing weight such as eating a healthier diet and exercising regularly might fear loosing her also overweight friends who might now look at her/him as him/her not being the same person. There might even be fear of success. What? Fear of success? It may be easy to understand fear of failure, but, of succeeding? Yes, some people unknowingly may have fear of success. Why? Possibly, a person with fear of success had a deep belief that rich people are rich because they cheated, or are selfish or some other negative trait that is attached to being financially independent subconsciously. This person will procrastinate starting his/her own business for fear at becoming financially independent and thus a cheater, or selfish, or whatever. Or, possibly, this person may not believe to be worthy of the kind of financial independence he/she dreams of due to low self esteem.
How can we overcome procrastination?
Here are some suggestions to overcome procrastination.
1. Ask yourself what you gain from not starting (or finishing) the task or making that decision that you dread. Be honest with yourself. I find useful to ask myself why? And when I answer, ask myself Why? again. Keep asking yourself why until there is no longer an answer.
2. Get someone else involved. For example, it’s much easier to exercise regularly when you have someone to do it with or that will hold you accountable.
3. If it’s a task that you feel is too involved or too big and overwhelming for you to handle, break it down into smaller, more manageable steps and complete them one at a time.
4. Reward yourself for having completing the task or a step to the task.
5. Delegate if possible. At home for example, who likes to clean? Certainly not me. But when I delegate all the different chores involved with cleaning between my daughters, my husband and myself, cleaning goes much faster.
6. Decide what’s important and what can really wait. I organize my to do list as A1, A2, A3, B1, B2, B3, and so on. The top priority that cannot wait I give it an A1 priority, and so on.
7. Visualize yourself completing the task, and how you would feel when you are done. Not just imagine but feel the feeling of having accomplished what you wanted, having reached your goal.
8. Don’t think about it too much. Jump and do it! Don’t wait for life to happen to you.
Tags: avoid procrastination, causes of procrastination, how to overcome procrastination, overcoming procrastination, procrastinating, procrastination, reasons for procrastination, waiting
Sometimes Life throws events into our lives that forces us to adjust to new and different circumstances, a new way of living and to have a major life change, whether we are ready for change or not, whether we like it or welcome it or not. A particular event maybe judged as a positive change or negative change. Whether a change is “positive” or “negative” depends on the perspective of the individual going through the change.
In 2001, I went through one of the most challenging times in my life. I went through a divorce. My life in those days was in constant turmoil. I was depressed, crying everyday, working full time and taking care of two 10 yr old girls that didn’t fully understand what was going on. And yet, in the middle of my depression and everything that was going on, I KNEW that “this too shall pass”. This experience catapulted me into the largest growth of my entire life. It encouraged and forced me to learn more about myself, about relationships; my belief system and spirituality grew stronger, I became a much stronger woman. I searched deep within my soul and finally discovered what I truly wanted in a man, in a relationship and I embarked in the quest for my happiness. I learned to love and respect myself and not to compromise for less than what I really wanted. I realized that I deserved the best that life has to offer, that I was truly worth it. I realize now that none of this would have happened without all that pain. Without this experience, I wouldn’t be who I am today, and I love who I am, who I’ve become. In retrospect, I realize now that the experience was truly a gift because of the woman I’ve become because of it.
It is funny how in our society, change is frightening. However, change is opportunity for growth. It is impossible to grow without change. To avoid change is to avoid growth. Improvement is ALWAYS the result of change. There cannot be improvement in our lives without change. When there is any kind of improvement in your life, is because you changed something. But this change often times involves letting go of what is known and jump into the unknown. It is this fear of the unknown that freezes us into continuing with the status quo. Most people will avoid change until the pain of not changing is greater than the pain of changing.
All meaningful change must come from the inside. The first and possibly the most important internal key change is our attitude. A positive attitude converts failure and adversity into golden opportunities, stepping stones that takes us higher rather than reacting in defeat, hopelessness and depression. Failure and adversity introduce us to opportunities that we might have missed otherwise. Managing change with a positive attitude is the key to attract success in relationships and finances.
Tags: change, growth, improvement, key change, life change, managing change, positive change, ready for change
Can you think of a good choice that brought about a bad thing and a bad choice that actually resulted in a good thing? Think about it. I can think of more “bad” choices that brought about good things than good choices that ended up with bad things. What about you?
Tags: bad choices, choices, good choices
Our mental attitude determine how we view our life, and how we react or act to the events that happen during our life time. Our beliefs determine our mental attitude. If you believe that you have no control over your life, then, when events happen, and they will happen (otherwise, our lives would have little or no meaning, if everything was “good” all the time) you will be at the mercy of these events like an autumn leaf is at the mercy of the wind.